:): Being hopeful and painful at the same time:(:

It has been long time for me to be here and I finally came up with the new post today. 

There are random times that I’ve thought of people whom I haven’t talked to them in recent years.

Wondering!!! Where are they and what are they probably doing ? This could itself be a big question for me Whenever, I hear their names in a random order. Counting... how many years,days and months I've passed since from the last time I have met them and shared smiles.

To be well-determined and more Independent sometimes, I also think that What if they are still stayed in my life? ? What if they are still talking to me and giving me random advises? Wouldn’t I have made any careless mistakes? or my life would have turned to be better ?

I can't even think about these swirling WHAT IF'S questions .

When ever i think of the days that are arriving with big changes in life,  I do scare like baby which is learning bicycle for the first time....

Whenever I feel myself disturbed by thinking about the future days and about my best friends whom i rarely get time to meet in future. I'm going to miss my friends with whom i used to hangout daily, clinging to their emotions and accompanying them in every task which will be just memories for each of them who are stepping out to the corporate world fighting for their existence.

I’ve found myself hoping that they will choose to stay.That they will still make me smile. That they will be with me while gazing at the twinkling little stars. That tomorrow and the day after that, they’re still calling my name, saying Hi and Hello.

But sometimes i need to accept the fact that some people never going to be back and some people will be forever gone, no matter how many times I’ve wished that they were here by my side. I’ve grieve for people who were not physically dead still absent throughout my life. I’ve missed people who have already changed and even will miss the people who are about to change by time! .

sometimes in future if i think of those people who have opted to stay and those who left my way...
 I may become so hopeful and painful at the same time ...